God created sex. Sex is a natural and positive thing. HIV is primarily spread through sexual contact. The church promotes safer sexual practices.
In this bible study, we look at the importance of companionship and sexual pleasure, the gift of celibacy, safer and non-safe sexual practices, and examine a Christian approach to sexual ethics.
Read more below!
Sex is not evil or bad. It is not something to be ashamed of. God is the one who created sex, not the devil. When God created, he looked at what he had done and evaluated is as “very good.†However, there was one thing that was not good: “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him†(Gen 2.18). Eve became the helper that rescued Adam from his loneliness.
In one of the early churches (Ephesus) there was a problem with false teachers (1 Tim 4.1–5). Amongst their diabolical heresies, they “forbid people to marry.†To correct this false teaching Paul states that whatever God created is good and should not be rejected but received with thanksgiving.
Sexual relations are part of the marriage relationship. “A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh†(Gen 2.24; Mt 19.5; Mk 10.7–8). Paul instructs people to get married in order to fulfill their sexual desires (1 Cor 7.9; cf. 1 Thess 4.3–8). God created marriage and sex and it is good, it is beautiful; it is fun; it is a gift from God; it is not to be rejected; it is to be received with thanksgiving.
One of the purposes of sexual intercourse is procreation. God’s blessing of Adam and Eve is followed by the command: “Be fruitful and increase in number.†Children were considered to be a blessing and a gift from God. However, sex is not intended only for procreation. It is meant for enjoyment: “may you rejoice in the wife of your youth … may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love†(Prov 5.18–19).
However, HIV is globally transmitted mainly through sex. Many cultures and churches do not speak about sex and sexual behavior openly (as one person told me “In Africa, we do not talk about sex, we practice itâ€). Sometimes it is considered not appropriate in certain cultures or churches to address the issue. This makes it difficult to deal with HIV and AIDS. Without frank discussion of what exactly people are doing in bed and behind bushes, it will be impossible to curb the epidemic.
Marriage itself is not a guarantee of protection from HIV. In Uganda, the majority of new HIV infections (42%) take place within a marriage relationship. If a couple is not involved in behavior that would place them as a risk to infection and are mutually faithful, it will minimize the risk of HIV infection. If “the marriage bed is kept pure†(Heb 13.4) and if the marriage vows are followed (“forsaking all others†being “faithful to him/her as long as you both shall liveâ€) a couple could enjoy sex without fear of HIV infection.
Celibacy
There were people (such as John the Baptist, Jesus, and Paul) who were single and never married. Paul spoke of his singleness as a “gift from God†(charisma 1 Cor 7.7; Mt 19.12). This gift allowed him to concentrate on “how he can please the Lord†(1 Cor 7.32–35). His ministry, calling and gifting allowed him to do this. According to Paul, a married person is “concerned about the affairs of this world – how he can please his wife – and his interests are divided†(1 Cor 7.33–34). At the same time, marriage did not hinder others like Peter (1 Cor 9.5) and Priscilla and Aquila (Acts 18.18, 26; Rom 16.3–4; cf. 1 Cor 16.19; 2 Tim 4.19) from doing the work in the ministry.
When Paul speaks about his own singleness, he states that “one has this gift, another has that†(1 Cor 7.7). If one cannot abstain from sex, Paul states that one should find fulfillment for their sexual desires in marriage (1 Cor 7.9; cf. 1 Thess 4.3–8). Celibacy will protect a person from HIV infection.
Safer Sex
The term “safe sex†has been replaced with “safer sex†because protection can never be absolute. “Safer sex†refers to sex practices in which participants protect themselves from viral transmission. Generally, safer sex is sex activity in which there is no mucous membrane contact or bodily fluid (semen, vaginal fluids, blood, etc.) exchange between partners. Safer sex protects from HIV as well as other sexually transmitted diseases. Often the term is used exclusively to the use of condoms but does not have to be used in that way.
The best way to protect oneself from becoming infected with HIV through sexual contact is abstinence. If one chooses not to abstain, then a mutually monogamous sexual relationship involves minimal risk of HIV infection. If a couple is not involved in risky behavior and are faithful to one another, there is no risk of HIV transmission. However, if one of the persons does have other sexual relations, it increases the risk.
Sexual practices and the risk of HIV infection
There are sexual practices that have a higher risk of HIV infection and others that involve no or extremely low risk. The items listed in no way condones or encourages any of the practices, but simply they are listed to differentiate between no-risk, extremely low-risk, low-risk and high risk sexual practices.
No-risk practices
- Self-masturbation
- Touching, massaging, hugging, caressing
- Social (dry) kissing
- Any type of sexual intercourse between partners who are certain that they are uninfected
Extremely low-risk practices
- There are activities that carry a small risk or theoretical risk of HIV transmission if one of the partners is HIV positive or the partners HIV status is unknown.
- French (wet) kissing
- Mutual masturbation (if no cuts on hands, and no ulcers or lesions on genitals of either partner)
- Vaginal sex with a male or female condom (with proper use, including putting latex or polyurethane condom in place before any penetration)
- Fellatio (1) with condom (with latex condom placed on penis before oral contact)
- Cunnilingus (2) with dental dam (with latex dam placed over vaginal area before oral contact)
- Anilingus (3) (rimming) with dental dam (with latex dam placed over anus before oral contact)
- Contact with urine (only with intact skin, avoiding contact with mouth)
- Using one's own sex toys (without sharing of any toys that contact body fluids)
Low-risk practices
- Anilingus without a latex dam
- Anal intercourse with condom (with proper use of condom, including placing latex condom on penis prior to any penetration, and using ample amounts of water-based or nonpetroleum-based lubrication with latex condoms)
- Anal or vaginal penetration with the hand with latex gloves
High-risk practices
- These sexual activities carry the highest risk of transmitting HIV between partners who are HIV positive or who not know what their HIV status is.
- Vaginal intercourse without a male or female condom
- Anal intercourse without a latex condom (highest risk is to the receptive partner)
- Anal penetration with the hand (fisting) or other rectal trauma without a latex glove, or fisting followed by unprotected anal intercourse
Sexual ethics
Some argue that “no one has any right to say anything about my sexual behavior. It is my own business, just as long as I am not hurting anyone.†However, the following points need to be considered:
- Everything, including our sexuality, is a gift from God and not our private possession that we can do what we want with it.
- Right and wrong is not decided by an individual, but is revealed by God.
- My sex life does involve others, and may hurt them even if I am unaware of it.
- There are orders or structures of human life established by God into which my individual life should fit, including sexual and family structures.
- Matters of right and wrong cannot be handled prescriptively, legalistically, casuistically, but go to the roots of human life in the heart and intentions. (4)
- Sexual sins are just as forgivable as any other sins that a person commits (Jn 8.1–11; 1 Jn 1.9).
Footnotes:
(1) Fellatio: the practice of touching a man’s penis with the tongue and lips to give sexual pleasure.
(2) Cunnilingus: the act of touching a woman’s sex organs with the mouth and tongue in order to give sexual pleasure.
(3) Anilingus: oral stimulation of the anus.
(4) M. Eugene Boring, “The Gospel of Matthew,†in The New Interpreter’s Bible Volume VIII (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1995), 197.